Anchor me

Over the last two years, L and I have experienced the following life events:

the death of a parent
the death of a step-parent
18 cycles of trying and failing to conceive
3 pregnancies ending in early loss
an episode of clinical depression
two work restructures
an elopement
2 car accidents
a major dispute amongst the owners of our apartment block.

Many of these things happened in our first year of being married. Before we got married, I expected that we were entering a rich new phase in our lives full of joy from having made a tangible commitment and the adventure of becoming parents. So far thats not how it has worked out. Instead we are both emotionally battered and trying to cope with a significant amount of psychic pain on a daily basis.

And I've been wondering, how do you sustain a relationship through this kind of prolonged stress and grief? How do we support each other when we are both debilitated by our own emotional pain? And while we are sticking together, I can see how major loss and grief can lead to relationship breakdowns.