I'm afraid that this pregnancy is now officially kaput. Got back my hcg results from a blood test yesterday and I am only at 13. I should be somewhere between 600-3000 by now.
Just to update this post, I wanted to say thank you so much to everyone who has been so supportive. L and I are very sad right now but know we are going to have a baby one day.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Threatened miscarriage
Well, here I am again. I wish I had better news to tell all of you but so far its not looking good. I started bleeding this afternoon at about 4.30 and now I'm cramping pretty badly. For those of you who I hadn't caught up, I am/was about 5 weeks pregnant.
Technically about 50% of people who have threatened miscarriage go on to have a normal pregnancy so its still a possibility. But the fact I haven't had any nausea or fatigue symptoms along with my worsening cramps really doesn't give me a lot of hope its going to work out.
I'm having a scan tomorrow, but they tell me it will be too early to tell whether the pregnancy is viable, although it will be possible to see if its clearly not.
I can't tell you how difficult this is and how unfair it feels but I guess this is the luck of the draw in the world of fertility. And my hand isn't that bad compared to many.
Technically about 50% of people who have threatened miscarriage go on to have a normal pregnancy so its still a possibility. But the fact I haven't had any nausea or fatigue symptoms along with my worsening cramps really doesn't give me a lot of hope its going to work out.
I'm having a scan tomorrow, but they tell me it will be too early to tell whether the pregnancy is viable, although it will be possible to see if its clearly not.
I can't tell you how difficult this is and how unfair it feels but I guess this is the luck of the draw in the world of fertility. And my hand isn't that bad compared to many.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
I have a shameful secret
I really want to see the Sex and the City movie.
I don't know why I find this piece of pop culture so compelling - after all I don't even like shoe shopping, haven't been into cocktails since the 1980s, never been with a married man and have never been one of those people who's successful at casual sex. Plus Sarah Jessica Parker makes a really odd heroine, to say the least. And yet it the TV series somehow touched a cord with me.
I don't know, something about autonomy and self-determination and friendship and maybe something about some of the issues women face in their 30s. Maybe its the chance for the length of the movie to have an alter-ego who wears fabulous couture, has a high powered career and is one of those people who is successful at casual sex.
So I've been reading up about the movie and apparently it focuses on the fact that they have all gotten older and are now in their 40s. Somehow I think I might find that kind of validating (even though I've a while to go until 40.)
Anyway, please let me know if you want to go with me because otherwise I'm going to be one of those people in the back of the theatre wearing a raincoat (except not dodgy).
In other news, all my blood tests came back in the normal range but that wasn't really a surprise because I had them done about a year ago and same deal. Still trying to work through the logistics of filling the little plastic jar at a time that Medlab will take it. Also we are thinking of taking some time off from ttc, just because it has been so emotionally draining and kind of hard on our relationship. Will wait and see how I feel about it next month.
I don't know why I find this piece of pop culture so compelling - after all I don't even like shoe shopping, haven't been into cocktails since the 1980s, never been with a married man and have never been one of those people who's successful at casual sex. Plus Sarah Jessica Parker makes a really odd heroine, to say the least. And yet it the TV series somehow touched a cord with me.
I don't know, something about autonomy and self-determination and friendship and maybe something about some of the issues women face in their 30s. Maybe its the chance for the length of the movie to have an alter-ego who wears fabulous couture, has a high powered career and is one of those people who is successful at casual sex.
So I've been reading up about the movie and apparently it focuses on the fact that they have all gotten older and are now in their 40s. Somehow I think I might find that kind of validating (even though I've a while to go until 40.)
Anyway, please let me know if you want to go with me because otherwise I'm going to be one of those people in the back of the theatre wearing a raincoat (except not dodgy).
In other news, all my blood tests came back in the normal range but that wasn't really a surprise because I had them done about a year ago and same deal. Still trying to work through the logistics of filling the little plastic jar at a time that Medlab will take it. Also we are thinking of taking some time off from ttc, just because it has been so emotionally draining and kind of hard on our relationship. Will wait and see how I feel about it next month.
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